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September 20, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Its Mike’s first day on the job as a bartender. As he serves a customer a Manhattan, a piece of parsley falls into the drink. “What the hell is that?” the customer asks. “It’s your Manhattan. And there’s Central Park.”

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September 19, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

An artist goes to the art gallery where his paintings are sold. The manager told him: I have a good news and a bad news.  An investor dropped by last week for a global evaluation of your paintings.  He asked

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September 18, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Wife says: “What are you doing?” Husband: Nothing. Wife: “Nothing…? You’ve been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.” Husband: “I was looking for the expiration date.” Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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September 14, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

I called an old classmate from school a few days ago and asked what he was doing… He replied that he was working on “Aqua-thermal treatment of ceramics, aluminum and steel, under a constrained environment.” I was impressed.. However, upon

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September 8, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A man got home from the pub at 3 o’clock this morning. His wife was waiting at the door with a rolling pin. The Husband said to her, ‘what are you doing ‘baking’ at this time of the night ?

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September 7, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

An elementary teacher was illustrating the circulatory system and asked her class “Why is it that when I stand on my head my face turns red from the blood rushing to my head, yet when I stand up that doesn’t

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September 6, 2017 -Jewel Joke Of The Day

What is the difference between golf and politics? In golf, you can’t improve your lie. Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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September 5, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A man driving his Bentley  is about to parallel park in a busy downtown street, just as he’s backing in, another man driving a Ferrari quickly zips into the parking spot and says “ That’s what you call speed”. The

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August 31, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Sweet heart … I have a great wonderful news for you…. Very soon, we will be three… The husband replied: Oh thank you. I am so happy…. The wife replied: Sweet heart… I am so glad you take it so

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August 30, 2017 -Jewel Joke Of The Day

I’ve always been confused between the definition of right and wrong. When I was a kid my parents would say, “Boy, you have done wrong.” I’d say, “Is that right?” They would say, “Yes.” Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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August 29, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

“What did the buffalo say to his son when he dropped him off at school?” “Bi Son” Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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August 28, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A guy goes to the doctor and after a thorough examination the doc says, “I’m going to put you in an isolation room.” The guy replies, “Will that make me better?” “No. I am also going to put you on

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August 25, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the vicar with an unusual offer. “Look, I’ll give you $100 if you’ll change the wedding vows. When you get to me and the part where I’m to promise to ‘love, honor and

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August 24, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Police Warning, There is a wig blowing about at the corner of Yonge and Bloor, Police warn ,do not approach it, as it’s off it’s head. Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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August 23, 2017 -Jewel Joke Of The Day

A Texas cowboy appeared before St. Peter at the pearly gates. “Have you ever done anything of particular merit?” St. Peter asked. “Well, I can think of one thing,” the cowboy offered. “On a trip to the Black Hills in

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