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May 2, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A genie came to me and asked, “What’s your first wish?” I answered, “I wish I was rich!” Then the genie said, “What’s your second wish, Rich?” Photo courtesy of clipartlibrary.com

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May 1, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A yellow Labrador walks into a job referral agency and asks if they have any openings for him. After the receptionist picks herself up off the floor, she asks the dog to come back in an hour. The dog agrees

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April 28, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Lady (to her doctor): “What l am worried about is my height and not my weight.” Doctor: “How come?” Lady: “According to my weight, my height should be 7 feet, 8 inches.” Photo courtesy of clipartreview.com.

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April 27, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Bill and Doug went into a diner that looked as though it had seen better days. As they slid in to a booth, Bill wiped some crumbs from the seat. Then he took a napkin and wiped some moisture from

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April 26, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Two campers are hiking in the backwoods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. “I’ll go into town for a doctor,” the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the only

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April 25, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

I was hospitalized for a few days, and my wife reported that my dog really missed me. “She spends the night at the front door, awaiting your return,” she said. “What an example of true love,” I replied. “I wonder

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April 24, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A Police officer talks to a driver: “Your tail light is broken, your tires must be changed, and your bumper hangs halfway down. That will be 300 dollars!” Driver: “Alright, go ahead and do it. They want twice as much

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April 21, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

The receptionist bursts into the doctors examination room and says, ” Doctor, the Invisible Man is in your waiting room!” The doctor calmly replies, ” tell him I can’t see him.” Photo courtesy of clipartpanda.com

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April 20, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter. “What are you doing?” she asked. “Hunting Flies,” he responded. “Oh!, Killed any?” she asked. “Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,” he replied. Intrigued, she

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April 19, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cellular phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen. MAN: “Hello”

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April 18, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Rhonda’s dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, “I’ll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and

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April 17, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A guy asked a girl in a library, “Do you mind if I sit beside you?” The girl answered with a loud voice, “I DON’T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!!!” All the students in the library started staring

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April 13, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

A boss bought a new BMW car. His employee congratulated and praised him. The boss said, “If you too would work hard, show sincerity, be punctual, don’t take leaves, work overtime, and meet deadlines then…” “Then what, sir?” asked the

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April 12, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

In a psychiatrist’s waiting room two patients are having a conversation. One says to the other, “Why are you here?” The second answers, “I’m Napoleon, so the doctor told me to come here.” The first is curious and asks, “How

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April 11, 2017 – Jewel Joke Of The Day

Ed and Nancy met while on a singles cruise and Ed fell head over heels for her When they discovered they lived in the same city only a few miles apart Ed was ecstatic. He immediately started asking her out

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